The 25 COPING SKILLS Everyone MUST HAVE! | Kati Morton

The 25 COPING SKILLS Everyone MUST HAVE! | Kati Morton

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100 thoughts on “The 25 COPING SKILLS Everyone MUST HAVE! | Kati Morton”

  1. I live a senior apt. And I've had such a terrible time with an intruder who is entering with a key causing vandalism, it has worn me down, after 4 lock changes the Police say they can't help cause since the intruder is using a key it's not considered a break in. Now 7yrs later there's a new manager and the I haven't noticed vandalism or theft.Tgese coping skills is what I do.

  2. I find a lot of these are really hard to do for me. Journalling for me results in intense rumination, I have anhedonia, so doing anything is a massive challenge, writing a little to my childhood just triggers my PTSD. No one upsets me, I upset me. Breathing techniques only work if I catch myself in time, which I often don't. I can't focus enough to read. I just critique myself when I try anything creative. I can't visualize anything right now.

  3. Baking has always been therapeutic for me. It allows me to create different desserts and take my mind off stressful issues such as work, school, family, etc.

  4. The most one of those works for me is drawing… I love to draw.. I feel like it's like accomplishing something… but I stopped drawing a year ago because of the pressure of studying crap (such a waste of talent).. and I can't walk either because my family question everything (where did you go? Why? who did you see there? What did they say to you?…)
    So I ended up cutting.. yay 🙂

  5. How does writing letters you do not send help with overcoming problems? If you truly want to tell somebody something I think it means that person means something to you and has really hurt you. How does pretending to talk to that person help?

  6. Writing music or making art in general. I feel that transforming emotions into art is the greatest gift that grief can bring. It sublimates it, and bring value to it. I even feel honored and proud for myself to allow my emotions to speak that way.

  7. Meditation (Mindfulness)
    Doesn't always work and need to practice daily, but can increase discipline in getting upset or panic after minor incidents. It kind of works for me like a breaker switch.

  8. "Someone positive in your life and remember that you're not alone". That makes me feel even worse because I have nobody

  9. Is there such a thing as overuse of coping techniques? For example, I find it takes forever decompress after work so I spend all my time distracting myself with TV/books to the point where I don't do things that need to be done because I feel like I just can't. Also what if you're stuck in a situation where it feels like no matter what you try you're still struggling to deal? What happens when you're coping techniques feel like they're not enough to keep you afloat?

  10. Cooking something that I love! Serves as a great distraction, yields amazing food and the feeling that I am taking good care of myself <3

  11. Vitamin D
    Painting your nails?
    Blowing bubbles ?
    Read good book
    Exercise
    Deep breathing 4*4
    Fav shows
    Draw doodle
    Colour
    Crossword puzzles
    Write Motivational quotes and paste
    Clean your house
    Play listen music
    Write a card to a friend
    Call a friend
    Feeling charts
    Journaling
    Emotion collage
    2-3 things you like about your situation
    Talk to a therapist
    Feel emotions in your body
    Write letter to younger older self
    Write letters to those who upset you but don’t send them.

  12. I did a basic search through the comments and didn’t find something that really addressed my question. And if it HAS been asked AND addressed, I’m sorry!!

    These are all solid ideas for coping and distracting yourself in order to “cope”.

    What I am trying to find are ways to cope in the moment.

    Like, an argument with a spouse and there’s not really going to be a way to “go for a walk” or “color” or anything like that. Or amp it up with a REALLY bad argument with a spouse… one where the option of saying something to the effect of, “You know I need to take a break, but want to get back to this in a few/several minutes” isn’t an option because everyone is SO keyed up that people are following each other around the house to continue making their points or shout or whatever.

    Or in the case of a job, say customer/technical support for example, a client is screaming at you and you can’t bring up anything in your brain rolodex to help and are basically serving as nothing more than a verbal punching bag for their anger… add in metrics that have to be met by your job (metrics = how much time to solve a call, or whatever… like you have 6 minutes after answering the phone to solve their issue)…

    I’ve gotten to the point where I’ve defaulted to punching myself as hard as I can in my thigh or breaking something or mashing my keyboard etc… simply because there was not running away from it. There wasn’t a “go for a walk” option, or “color” or anything of that nature.

    For context, I’m a middle aged man, with diagnosed Major Depression, and Adult ADHD.

    Currently, unemployed from a layoff so the work part isn’t as relevant at the moment, but it eventually will be. I had tried a number of meds for help with depression and nothing seemed to help. Adderall did help at least for a period of time before it wore off.

    Anyway, I know this is an older thread, but thanks just the same!

  13. I love to have “spa baths” at night at least once a month. I use epsom salt and lavender in my bathtub, comforting music, candles. After my bath I apply scented delicious oils consciously on all of my body and go to sleep like a baby!

  14. Dear Kati, can you make a video or recommend a book or anything useful to learn the basics of emotions? To recognize them, understand their function and how to deal with them? Love your channel

  15. Weed and cbd has been so amazing to help. You don’t have to be extremely high, but even just a little buzz helps and chills you out. Same with prescribed Xanax. This is so good for post panic attack help

  16. In my province in Canada, vitamin D testing is no longer covered under the provincial health care plan. I asked my MD about it and he said there was no evidence saying low levels were a concern. If you have a links to studies, can you post them?

    I went to an ND and she ordered the test. I paid out of pocket, found out my levels were very low so now supplement with D3.

  17. I like to focus on what I can feel, see, touch, hear, and smell. Just a grounding technique that helps a lot.

  18. I started juggeling a week ago. It really helps distracting my mind and getting a better conection with my body.

  19. Number 25, fill an ice tray with red coloured water. (color the water a tad, not too much!) wait for the water to turn to ice, and place the ice on your arm. you get the visual blood affect, and you feel the pain. I really love this mechanism, it really helps me

  20. In line with the "cleaning the house," tip, while, albeit, not always feasible depending on the size and weight of each item, I always loved rearranging the furniture in my room and my house whenever I was upset. Although the "problem" or "stress" never went away, looking at my room in a different light always made it feel better and like I had control. It was personalized and I could always change it back. I don't know if the whole Chinese philosophy on Feng Shui is legitimate or not, but I will say that sometimes just moving my desk to a different part of the room or changing the direction that my bed was facing made a huge difference in how I felt the next day and how I slept at night. It also counts as a bit of exercise 🙂 and I had to clean to move the furniture, so got 3 birds 😀

  21. My number 25 is listening to podcasts. One of my favourites is TED radio hour. I find Guy Raz has such a soothing and friendly voice. Also, watching Bob Ross is very soothing. 🙂

  22. My problem is when my anxiety is high, taking time to utilize these coping skills only increases my anxiety, because I feel like I should be doing something productive, to actively remove stressors.

  23. distraction: 1,4,6,7,8,9,11,12,13
    processing: 4,5,10,11
    #25: pets, gardening, spirotual practice (prayer), distorted thinking check-in (used with processing 4,5,10,11), self-hypnosis, mantras, creating a new symbol

  24. Looking after my indoor plants and gardening.
    Stroking a piece of velvet or silk helps distract me from self harming. Running water, watching it hearing it and feeling it has always helped me. Drinking ice cold water too

  25. No. 25 : for me is to pamper myself with a massage/ pedicure / manicure / facial. It not only is soothing but it also makes you feel better with its outcome.

  26. I'm actually sitting outside painting my nails with my cat on my lap and laughing about the first few examples she is giving.

  27. 1.) Go for a walk.
    2.) Paint your nails.
    3.) Blowing bubbles.
    4.) Reading a book or listening audio book.
    5.) Exercise.
    6.) Breathing exercises.
    7.) Watching a fav serie.. Or tv show.
    8.) Draw anything.
    9.) Color.
    10.) Solve puzzles.
    11.) Write positive quote and stick everywhere.
    12.) Clean your house.
    13.) Creating and listening music.
    14.) Write a letter to your friend.
    15.) Call a nontoxic friend.
    16.) Write your self on paper. Impulse logs.
    17.) Making feeling charts.
    18.) Journaling. (Positive)
    19.) Feeling word colleges..
    20.) Write about what you like in you.
    21.) Talk to a therapist.
    22.) Focus on how your emotions effect ur body.
    23.) Write a letter to ur self. Past or future.
    24.) Write honest letters to people u want but don't send.
    25.) Lock your self in a room and dance like diva😍
    26.) Help people to save their time.. 😁😁
    27.) Say anything loudly.. With out caring about anyone.
    28.) Except yourself. Ur thoughts. Ur mind as it is.!!
    29.) Love and care yourself like u will for your sweet heart…….. 😘
    30.) Don't run behind IDEAL… U are what u are…
    31.) LOVE AND RESPECT YOUR SELF AND YOUR THOUTHS. 😊😊❤

  28. I thank fate for having me pick up drawing in 6th grade and learning to play guitar. These two have helped me immensely in expressing myself. I find that no one diagnosis ever quite fits me and my experiences, but focusing instead on coping and recovering/self improvement has been a good route for me so far.
    I wish anyone reading this a good journey on their way in life <3

  29. This video gave me the idea to: take time and select a nice notebook and name it my "Coping book". And inside of it i can do a lot of these tasks like the brainstorming feelings, doodling, colouring, writing positive quotes, write notes to people, impulse log, journal etc. I'm going to try it 🙂 helpful video xx

  30. Moreso than exercise, and more available to everyone who might be limited in mobility or have exercise triggers: stretching is great for redirecting my focus and energy.

  31. Taking a benadryl if it's too far bad..ask resort. washing the dish… breaking something that you want to throw away scream into pillow. Healthy coping is possible. It is. But it takes strength. It's weak to hurt yourself and easy. It's attractive and shows strength to cope healthy. It has a bigger reward and gets u positive attention

  32. A mentor of mine would have me blow bubbles while reciting “ I am a miracle bubble and no one can pop me”! Also the smell of crayons are actually beneficial to both our mental and physical health. The smell has been known to reduce blood pressure by at least ten points!! I give boxes of crayons and bubbles as gifts.

  33. Streaching!

    Long anecdote: 

    I recently had a situation where I was overwhelmed with frustration at festive situation – in this case competitive games as part of a bachelor party, but these meltdowns often happens for me in otherwise festive or happy situation where apparently things just gets too much for me.

    My usual coping would be crying, in a corner bathroom or closet in hiding somewhere, but this was in a forest and right before we were supposed to go in a car together and drive for quite a whole.

    No hiding, no escapes, not alot of time. Oh, and crying in public has gotten an increasingly worsened anxiety trigger for me – both for fear of how I might look, what people will think about my capabilitie and ability to keep a job, if it might affect my current job etc. etc. But also, I fear the otherwise natural response of people that would be offering me care, empathy, nice guestures, asking me questions about what's wrong which I can't explain or express but worst of all, make the crying worse and trigger even worse anxiety responses. (Which is also a flaw in the instinctual hide and cry method.. people can see when you have cryed and they still ask). And worse yet, I don't want to ruin the day or the experience for the others, and for this day in perticular the bride and groom to be.

    My body was so filled with build up anger and frustration, heat and vibration, and I was like a deer in headlights. I felt my only options were shouting and punshing something (or someone 🙁 ) and making a mess of a huge scene… Or crying probably panicing then crying hysterically and probably make a similar mess of a huge scene. Off course I couldn't beat sometimes, so I turned my back and started crying and felt the anxiety comming… But then somehow got the inpulse to do some stretching, and that just worked wonders! 

    It gave my thoughts a distraction and somewhere else to go than on my body spiraling out of control… In stead focusing on the patterns (I do rutines of streaching during my day when I'm tired or dizzy and feel like need my blood and my heart to pick up the pace and start circulating again – also sometimes before excercise.) It also gave my build up energy somewhere else to go, and helped me relax my muscles til I in the end could collapse like a flat balloon without tears noticably running. 

    So I could keep it down for the car ride and walk it off later. 

    I am amazed. Will defenately be trying this again 🙂

  34. I find that crying and screaming at home is a coping strategy for me. This is what I've learned in therapy. I feel peace with myself after I do this.

  35. I personally enjoy journaling about my emotions and doing something I enjoy like playing the piano and reading and listening to music

  36. I wrote down quotes and hung them up around the house a few years ago. They still hang today. On the kitchen "Blessed are those who see beautiful things where others see nothing", in the bathroom "you look so good when you smile" and in the hallway on the door "sometimes you have to step outside and remind yourself of who you are and who you wanna be" and many more 🙂 I also love listening to podcasts or affirmations whilst drawing or these days, playing Sims, on days where nothing else is possible. Or singing and video editing, those things can make me forget the dark of my world.

  37. Thanks for this video. I know this is like a year later, but I've been watching your videos for awhile and they're super helpful.

    I've been needing to find some coping mechanisms. I have ARFID, or have thoughts/feelings related to those of ARFID that are a result of another problems, and I get really anxious around most food, too the point where I've had panic attacks and thoughts of self harm. I'm also ace, nonbinary, and have a girlfriend, which isn't an issue. It's my family who are closed minded and miseducated (who refuse to be educated) and it stresses me out so much. I used to keep a journal but I'm scared to now because my stepmom read it. I want to overcome this stupid fear, and I think finding healthy coping mechanisms is a step in the right direction. It would be especially helpful if I can find one or two that are portable and that I can use in public without feeling ashamed or judged. Sorry for the long post!

  38. #25 (my number 1) Ask God for help, know that he is helping behind the scenes, focus on all that is good in my life and ask God for help to figure out what to do next, using lists to get clear if a lot is going on, and when I know what to do next, I do it. Sometimes I just need to read bible verses and let God's love sink in. Other times I just need to do something nice for someone else and feel good about that. It's all drawing on God's love and help and his purpose for me.

  39. While I was watching this video, I popped bubble wraps to the point my fingers ached and I also meditate to help cope with my heavy feelings. Feeling calm is my ultimate goal when my jaws are clenched and my shoulders and back tensed and my headache pounding. I hope this helps some. 🙂

  40. Hi Kati, thank you for all you do for us. You are so helpful, comforting and inspiring. Can you please make some videos on the topic of adult children estrangement? My son is in his mid forties, is married, and has my two beautiful grandchildren. I miss them and have been respectful of their decision. They know that my door is always open. It has been five years and is painful and disappointing. I 'm not having time with my grandchildren, and they are growing up so fast. His issues do stem from past trauma from my abusive marriage. I have struggled through my own trauma and moved on to make a good and healthy life and marriage and pray that he can too. Thank you Kati.

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