[ASMR] Professional Matchmaking Service Roleplay (Daisy)


Okay, um… Yes, I know. No, Mrs. Jones I understand that you want him
to move out of your basement, but your son is just going to have
to come into the office and fill out a form for himself I can’t just *whispering* arrange a marriage..! Okay? No, Mrs. Jones, please don’t yell at me. I’m just… I gotta go Hello there I’m Daisy. Are you lost? Oh! No, this is the matchmaking office. Are you looking for a match? Well, then come right on in! Okay, well, let’s get you all set up This shouldn’t take you too long Here are our terms and conditions It basically just says if you go on a terrible date or whatever you can’t sue us, okay? We’ve had it happen So If you want, you can call me Cupid! Or, don’t, actually I don’t think my boss likes that I do that Okay, so it’s actually very simple What I’m gonna do is help you fill out your online profile and then, you know… People will be able to look at your profile, see your face and your interests And they’ll, um, be able to match with you, and you’ll be able to match with them. And you go on a date and live happily ever after See, it’s not so hard… Okay, so What I’m gonna do is start you with a new profile because you haven’t been here before, have you? Okay, sometimes we have repeat customers
after a couple years The first thing I’m gonna need is your name Your last name, too And do you use your middle name at all? No? Ok And what is your email? .com And your phone number? Well, how else are all the eligible people
gonna be able to contact you? Okay, so what is your gender? Okay, and your age? A lot of people like to lie about their age But you can tell me your real age! Okay. And now this question is what are you… seeking? You know, um, you could be looking for females, males… You could be looking for marriage, companionship Some people come in here for friendship Some people come in here for… more specific things… but… What are you looking for? Okay, so let’s get that And that’s very common It is Okay, so you shouldn’t have trouble finding… Matches So You are looking for long term, short term? Okay, yes And I’m just going to get a few um Physical information bits about you How tall are you? Okay, yes, I could’ve guessed that I just have an eye for those things And your weight? And you can just describe your body type Is it more… you know? I think so, too Yep, perfect And how about your hair? Okay Would you call that- Yeah I think so and your eyes I already wrote that one down Okay So, would you like to put down
your ethnicity or your religion? Ethnicity Yeah, if have you have all those little percents? 5% Irish, 5% whatever You know, you can put those down Some people are interested in it Genealogy and all that And then your religion, or lack of, or whatever you- Flying spaghetti-what? Okay Alright Now for the lifestyle Do you drink? Smoke? Recreational drug use? Okay Now how about your education? So you can have- You could be in school right now Or you graduated: high school, college, masters, PhD? Professor? Wizard? I don’t know. And where did you get that from? What school? Oh, very nice! No, I didn’t finish college Okay So, your location You came to this office,
so I assume you’re from around here But, I could put your city down
and we can give you matches that are Closer to ya, more convenient Okay Interesting No, don’t worry I-I don’t- Well not supposed to save any of this information Okay Occupation? Ooh, very nice! And talents? Oh you know, what are you talented at? It could be anything This is sort of silly Mmm Oh! Wow! And then sort of below that is what are your hobbies? Okay Yeah, you know what? I never could get into that I tried for a while, but… mm mm I respect the people who do, though Okay Now the important question is: do you have any pets? Okay And how many? Okay So are you a dog person or a cat person? Okay My sister is a snake person Mm-hmm 12 snakes Ain’t that crazy? Okay Next, do you have kids? Okay Now all you have to do is
tell me a little bit about yourself you know, like What’s your place like? I bet you have a great apartment Okay Oh, yes, I like that, too Oh Well, you’re not gonna have trouble
finding a match at all Okay, so now we have, um, some just- hot topic questions Is- what- um- What’s the best place you’ve ever been? Oh, okay Oh, you have to take a long flight for that! Do you get anxious on flights? We get a lot of people who do Okay, and what type of food do you like? I know that’s such a hard question because I can’t answer it, so I don’t know why we ask other people to answer it but- Who knows? Okay So basically, you just eat anything That’s a good way to be, good way to be Okay Now, would you consider yourself
an extravert or an introvert? Okay I am definitely… An introvert, yes Oh, can’t you tell? I’m very shy and demure. Okay Now that your profile is all set up I’m gonna figure out what you want in a partner Okay So, do you have a gender preference? Okay How about a height preference? Just for relational purposes I am 5 foot 10 inches It’s a little tall Yeah, okay It’s good to know Next is your- if you have a body type preference Mm-Hmm or, or that okay And we can set these priority levels from 0 to 5 So if it’s not that much of a priority to you,
I can set it low, and you’ll be able to find people of all different types Okay Now do you have a hair color preference? No? Okay, never mind Um- Okay what about kids, pets? Okie dokie and location Okay, so what like mile… radius? Got it. All right. Now, How similar would you like your partner to be to you? So that means like- I can check all the boxes of the information
that you put in and try to get you the most similar match Sometimes they say opposites attract Okay So I can sort them by similarity Good Now, Describe your ideal date Okay That sounds wonderful Please go on Plea- Oh right, I’m supposed to be writing this down I’m sorry I don’t know where my head is Oh, Daisy And, So if one of these… eligible people contact you,
where would you, um, where would you take them first? Yeah That is marvelous Okay So I’m gonna ask you aboutyour favourite music,
movies, books and television shows because that is one of the most important things
to know when making a match Yes, you didn’t know that? Imagine if you loved Breaking Bad and your partner does not What do you do? Exactly Okay, so music? And you can just give me your top three or so Movies? I haven’t seen that one yet It’s been on my list for a long time Books? And television shows? Good choice Okay So, do you play any video games? ’cause we can add that as an option, too Okie dokie Yeah, I play online Sometimes Okay So, how is your extended family life? ‘Cause, you know We get a lot of mama boys and daddy’s girls in here Good to know Yes, as you can tell,
I was on the phone with one of those mamas Okay So, it seems like you are all set up So this is the fun part I’m gonna take your picture Oh, that’s okay; you look fantastic! And what we’re gonna do Is use it, scan it, post it and we’ll see if you get some dates Ready? Okay, are you- you posin’? Here we go! Three, two, one Now, I know you’re not supposed to shake these but I can’t help it Okay, so I’m going to upgrade you,
since you’ve been so kind, to our Turbo service Which means that
you’re gonna get rapid matched with people It sounds overwhelming, but I think you deserve it Oh No! You know, the picture- It didn’t quite turn out I think I’m gonna have to take another one Yeah, sorry about that Ready? You know, it happens sometimes Don’t worry about it Okay So we’ll scan this one in as soon as that develops Okay Let’s go ahead and do that Okay And we’ll just sit back and wait until it- Oh my! Oh mah gawd! I’ve never seen this happen before You’re getting a lot of- lot of requests I didn’t even put you on turbo yet! I told you this would happen 50, 51, 52 Oh- I’m gonna have to ask you to go take a seat,
so we can go through these All right Well, thank you for using our matchmaking service It seems like it’s gonna be very successful for you Okay, I’ll deal with this You can go take a seat Okay

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